Microsoft Lets You Know If You're Getting a Good Deal on a Wool Beret

Ok, last post about the new Microsoft ad campaign. At least for today. Say what you will about the accuracy of the machines compared, the "Apple tax" the value of a computer of its lifetime, etc. There's one invaluable service that Microsoft is providing that both Apple and Microsoft users can agree upon: the street value of random objects.

As part of their banner ads comparing Macs and PCs, the PC is generally listed along with two other kinda random/supposed to be funny items, like babysitting, or a wool beret. And in an effort to be as accurate as possible, the corresponding Microsoft legal page lists the estimated value of these items. So the next time you wonder whether you 're overpaying the babysitter, let Microsoft help:

100 20oz Sodas - $200

Based on price of typical 20oz soda

16 Culinary Classes - $960

Based on typical price of culinary classes

343 Lattes - $1,100 ($3.20 Each)

Based on price of typical medium latte

2 3-Day Passes to Music Festival - $500

Based on price of typical 3-day music festival pass

3 Year Magazine Subscription - $150

Based on price of typical business magazine subscription — 3 years

Cover Charge for 2 to Miami Beach Nightclub - $50

Based on price of typical cover charge on Miami Beach

Tandem Skydiving Lessons - $199

Based on price of typical tandem skydiving lesson

Wool Beret - $48

Based on price of typical high-end wool beret

Designer Desk - $199

Based on price of typical designer desk

Pair of Supra Vaiders - $98

MSRP

5 Hours of Babysitting - $75

Based on price of typical national babysitting rate

2 Tickets to Play - $104

Based on price of typical mid-range theater tickets in New York area

600 Diapers - $240

Based on price of typical diaper at local retailer

1-Hour European Facial - $70

Based on price of typical national spas for European facials

Thanks Microsoft!

Dear ABC: Put Ballmer on Dancing With The Stars

An Open letter to ABC...

ABC, you've dazzled us with your selection of Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak for this year's installment of Dancing With The Stars. Several injuries have plagued the dancers this year, and you never know when an injury might force someone out of the competition prematurely. It can be tough to have a competent, radiant performer waiting in the wings. 

I happen to know of such a performer, and his addition to the show would stir up a geek rivalry unlike no other. Please bring Steve Ballmer to the show.

You see, in his capacity at Microsoft, Mr. Ballmer is known to become, excitable and passionate, but he always does it with an unmatched grace, or at least a grace matched only by the operating system his company produces. I've found a demo reel of his classic performance:

It would be the can-do, optimistic spirit of "Woz", versus whatever that was you just watched. Just keep it in mind. I'm sure you'll do the right thing.

Thank You

Woz Defies The Odds With Your Help

You can't say Apple fans aren't a loyal bunch. Especially to Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak. In what might be the biggest shocker in Dancing With The Stars history, Woz survived last night elimination, despite having the lowest score the week before. In fact he wasn't even subjected to the Dance-Off, an agony I'm pretty sure was created by the minds behind 7th grade dances. At any rate, DWTS bases rankings on both judges' scores, and viewer votes. The exact way those votes are tabulated is more than a bit of mystery and has led to some questions of legitimacy, even from Woz. (who later rectracted it) But the Mac (and broader tech) community pulled together and got him through to the next round. The next show is a double-elimination, with two "stars" sent home. Can he pull it off?

Incredible!

How To Destroy Any Website

Ok, so I might be late on this one. As a matter of fact, judging by the google results, I might be several years late on this. Still, I just discovered this site, and I wanted to share it: www.NetDisaster.com. In short, you enter any URL, add a disaster method, then you are taken to see that site "destroyed." In reality, it's not doing anything to the actual website, it's just creating an overlay at a different URL. Still, if they haven't seen it yet, it's a great way to prank webmasters. Enjoy. (And don't forget April Fool's Day will be here before you know it.) Unfortunately, you can't share the results with others due to this incident.

Steve Jobs Working at MSNBC

I know, I know, we were just as surprised as you, but the photo doesn't lie. Below is a screen capture from MSNBC. Do you notice a familiar looking person in the background? Clearly Jobs has totally pulled a Bueller on Apple, and is working as a low-level producer at MSNBC while everyone thinks he's off sick. Sneaky!

There is the off chance that this is merely someone who has a passing resemblance to Jobs, but what fun is that?