Breaking News: Microsoft Doesn't Get It
Tuesday, September 22, 2009 at 12:31PM 
As we mentioned last night on TDL Live, it's been reported that Microsoft has been contacting Apple retail employees, particularly managers to offer positions within Microsoft's own new retail stores.
It's one thing to ape the design of the store, to take something like the genius bar, and rename it the "guru bar." Heck, it's a lot like the "recycling bin" instead of the trash can. It's quite another thing if Microsoft seriously believes they can hire anyone of any merit away from Apple retail and into their stores.
(First a reminder/disclaimer that everyone here at TDL has worked for Apple in some retail capacity at some point.) People working at the Apple store generally fall into four categories: Apple evangelists, summer job seekers, teachers, and creative pros between gigs. Which one of these groups would be willing to go turncoat on Apple, let alone uproot their lives to work at a Microsoft retail store? Sure, getting someone higher up the food chain, like Ron Johnson (head of Apple retail) would be a coup, but that's not going to happen. The best you could hope for are some regional managers who don't feel comfortable at Apple because they come from other retail store background, or a few people who have had a bad experience working at Apple, and want to get some measure of revenge.
Again, which one of these two groups makes for a great staff? If you want retail managers who don't fit the Apple mold, just cut out the middleman, and look to other retailers. If you're seeking out those looking for revenge, do you really think it'll be long before they turn on Microsoft too?
Redmond has to learn that people are not programs or features, or icons. They are living, breathing things with emotions and common sense.
And really, that's all you need to see this is a really stupid idea.
Microsoft, apple retail, retail Permalink
Reader Comments (5)
I think Ryan hit it out of the park on this one. I hadn't heard that Microsoft was going into retail outlets, but I am reminded of something from the duPont Past. Their Imaging Department sold their papers and print products through a series of dealers. When recommended that they set up direct marketing outlets, the duPont managers said that doing such a thing would betray their distributors and hurt their overall business. They were right; they would trade short term profit for long time loss.
Jeez, I hope nobody from Microsoft reads this.
I represented 3 of 4 of Ryan's employee categories when I was there (and I could be creative when I wanted too). What if you took this to its ultimate end? What if you took an Apple store and changed only one thing? What if you keep the store the same with a glass and steel entrance, the same lights and product placement inside? What if you have the same staff wearing t-shirts and name lanyards, collecting credit cards with hand-held systems? And what if you pick the best looking PC laptops and desktops to showcase?
Eventually you have to replace the software and OS on the machine.
I couldn't have been excited about teaching customers to "Think Different" from that point on. And I'd like to think that enjoying their computer experience was why people kept coming back. Good Luck, Microsoft... but I'm not betting on the success of the stores.
It's not a bad thing. An Apple employee moving to a Microsoft store raises the average IQ in both outlets.
There's an old Linda Ronstadt song that goes, "It aint the meat, it's the motion ...". MS thinks this is all about 'meat'. Profits, market share and so on. These stores of theirs will offer nothing except what you can find at your loca best buy. Actually, less. Apple is about motion, the experience. The true delight of usability. People walk out of an Apple store on a high. All Apple store employees know this, better yet, feel this and I just cannot belive that a single one of them would jump ship for a few extra bucks. MS has never gotten it and never will. Their stores will be a novelty for awhile and then just another phenomenal failure. And I truly hate to think about the stress that will just overcome any "Guru" at an MS store ... all the general PC pubic walking in wih their probelms, some laptop causing them trouble, etc. The horror stories are going to be all over the web from day one. Yelling at an MS 'guru' about their generic PC acting up on them, blaming MS. This is a pending PR disaster for MS and whoever thought this up was definitely not sober that day ...
"raise the average IQ" *** Hilarious***
Preface: iMac
You're all correct. It's the whole experience. You can clone the location, decor, and *almost* the staff. But when the public looks at the screen instore they see the face of the same unreliable crap that they have at home. ( You know, the pig with the lipstick bit ). The best of the MS related hardware don't "do too good" either. Form DOES imply functionality. The cleaner sleeker design implies efficiency - and saves money in my power bill.
"Guru Bars" - doesn't matter whether they are just "info bars". People NOW EXPECT that a Genius/Guru Bar is there for Tech Support. So what happens when they go to the "Windows Experience"? Even if it is explained that no specific help is available, the customer still leaves with a sour experience.
The whole thing is going to be the Zune Experience all over again: Too little. Too late
But this one's going to be FAR more publicly visible.